Saturday, July 23, 2016

Our Table



Image result for set table


Our Table


Image result for dinner time quoteWe believe in the importance of the family coming around the table for meals.  Conversation flourishes, and it is often the only time that everyone is together.  We have many rules of conduct so that the table is a pleasant place to be.  Everyone is to sit up straight, legs forward, being attentive and interested in all that is being said.  Utensils are to be used in a civilized manor.  No fighting or arguing allowed.  No conversations that excludes others.  Especially no computer game talk.  Only nice words about the food are allowed to be said.  The table is to be set properly and everyone is to use a napkin to wipe their face and hands.  Everyone is expected to stay at the table while eating and no one is allowed to get up without expressed permission.  We start every meal with a round robin of prayers starting with the youngest ending with Dad.  Then we say the Lord prayer in concert.

Dinner at our house doesn't just happen.  It takes careful planning.  I plan out many menu options, pre-cook/prep and freeze the main course.  We usually have rice, canned or fresh veggies as our sides.  With the use of my pressure cooker or Randy grilling we keep the heat out of the house and meal prep time to a minimum.  Kids are being taught to take on every aspect of the process.  This is critical for us as meal time seems to be when everything is happening.  Kids need picking up, home work is still being done, practice to get to and church to attend.  This mamma needs to conserve her energy to be pleasant around the table.

       Image result for dinner time quoteImage result for dinner time quote
Now what has been listed above is the agreed upon behavior but as my children are still being raised it is a battle to keep the ship on course and seems like a lifetime to internalize these values.  What happens most nights is I am constantly correcting everything from unacceptable conversation, wiping mouths on their shirt, eating like a cave man, Dad laughing at their belching or description of some bodily function.  Yet despite all these dips in the road progress is being made and gentlemen and ladies will be made out of them yet.

Lord Prayer

Matthew 6:9–13 (ESV) "Pray then like this: 'Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.'"

Image result for dinner time quote  Image result for lords prayer
Image result for mealtime manners
Below are ten timeless rules I apply to all my conversations:
  1. Be genuinely interested in the person. Who is this person? What’s on his/her mind? What does he/she enjoy doing? What motivates him/her in life? These are the questions I have for every single person I meet. Since people form the core of my life purpose (to help others grow), my genuine interest in people, from who they are to what they do, comes naturally.Such genuine interest, not an artificial one, is essential to making a conversation fly. If you are not interested in the other person, then why speak to him/her to begin with? Move on to someone you really want to talk to. Life is too short to be spent doing things you don’t like.
  2. Focus on the positives. Go for the positive topics. Which means rather than talk about past grievances, opt for a discussion of future goals. Rather than talk about the coffee that spilled on your table this morning, talk about that movie you are looking forward to watch later in the evening. It’s okay to talk about “negative” topics (read: topics that trigger negative emotions) once in a while, but only when you feel it is okay with the other party and when it has a specific purpose (e.g., to get to know the other person better or to bond with the person).Principle #4 of 10 Timeless Principles for Lasting Happiness teaches you how to see the positives over the negatives in every situation.
  3. Converse, not debate (or argue). A conversation should be a platform where opinions are aired, not a battle ground to pit one’s stance against another. Be ready to chat, discuss, and trash out ideas, but do so amiably. There’s no need to have a conclusion or agreement point in every discussion; if a convergence has to be met with everything that is mooted, the conversation would be very draining. Allow for things to be left open-ended if a common point can’t be achieved.
  4. Respect; don’t impose, criticize, or judge. Respect other people’s point of view. Respect other people’s space—don’t encroach on the person’s privacy unless a common bond has been established. Respect other people’s personal choices—don’t criticize or judge. Everyone has his/her right to be him/herself, just as you have the right to be yourself.
  5. Put the person in his/her best light. Always look for ways to make the person look good. Give credit where credit is due. Recognize talent where you see it. Drop compliments where appropriate.  Allow the person to shine in his/her own light.
  6. Embrace differences while building on commonalities. Everyone is different. At the same time, there are always commonalities across people. For the differences, embrace them. They make all of us unique. Agree to disagree if there are clashes in ideas.As you talk to the other person, look for commonalities between you and him/her. Once you find a common link, build on it. Use that as a platform to spin off more discussions which will then reveal more about both of you. For the new commonalities that get unveiled, build on them further.
  7. Be true to yourself. Your best asset is your true personality. Embrace it and let it shine. Don’t cover it up. It’ll be pretty boring if all you do is mime the other person’s words during a conversation; there wouldn’t be anything to discuss at all. Be ready to share your real thoughts and opinions (not in a combative manner of course—see #3). Be proud of what you stand for and be ready to let others know the real you. Read: Finding Your Inner Self
  8. 50-50 sharing. I always think that a great conversation should be made up of equal sharing by both parties. Sometimes it may be 40-60 or 60-40 depending on the circumstances, but by and large, both parties should have equal opportunities to share and contribute to the conversation.What this means is that you should be sensitive enough to pose questions to the other party if you have been talking for a while. (See #9.) It also means that you should take the initiative to share more about yourself if the other party has been sharing for the most part. Just because the person doesn’t ask doesn’t mean you can’t share; sometimes people don’t pose questions because it is not in their natural self to do so.
  9. Ask purposeful questions. Questions elicit answers. The kind of questions you ask will steer the direction of the conversation. To have a meaningful conversation with the other person, ask meaningful questions. Choose questions like, “What drives you in life?”, “What are your goals for the next year?” and “What inspired you to make this change?” over “What did you do yesterday?” and “What are you going to do later?”. Some questions for your perusal: 101 Important Questions To Ask Yourself.Some people may not be ready to take on conscious questions, and that’s fine. Start off with the simple, trivial, everyday questions as you build a rapport. Then, get to know the person better through deeper, more revealing questions—when you think the person is ready to share.
  10. Give and take. Sometimes people say pretty weird stuff during conversations. For example, a critical comment here and there, a distasteful remark, and a bad joke. Don’t judge them for those comments; treat these blurts as Freudian slips. Give them the benefit of doubt (unless clearly proven otherwise). I know that I make some random oddball comments sometimes which leave me wondering why I even did that afterwards. Usually I just laugh or shrug it off; it makes for funny conversation banter.

Klepetko Book of Virture - Table of Contents

The Klepetko Family Book of ... Virtue, Character, Etiquette

Our Table
Social Interactions
Work Ethic
Being/Making Friends
Respect for Authority
Being a Disciple of Christ
Being/Choosing a Spouse
The Seasons of Life
Cherishing Extended Family
Being Authentically You
Meal Planning
Hospitality
Maintaining a Home
Managing your Money
Keeping the Fun in Family
Your Many Roles (Mother, Father, Daughter, etc.)
Relationship Skills (Boundaries, Taking Responsibility, Forgiveness, etc)
Life Goals for our Children
Education
Career
Addiction

Thursday, February 25, 2016

Mean Girls


Tell me, tell me what did she say about me.  I just need to know.  I know she is talking bad about me. It's not like I'm going to hurt her.  Your not going to tell me?  Your mom says that would be gossip?  Well I'm just trying to warn you.  She can't be trusted.

My ten year old says all the girls are like this.  What's a mom to do?  I've instructed her not to listen or spread gossip.  If someone wants to talk badly about someone to her they better be ready to confront the situation with that person.  My daughter might be friendless today because of it.  She may be surrounded by whispers, finger pointing and stares.  She could have gone with the flow by giving the information the girl wanted.

My daughter is sweet, emotional, and avoids conflict like the plague.  Laugh it off, change the subject but if they are stronger than you don't make waves.  She can give the what for to her little brothers and the dog but that's about it.  Get a back bone we say.  Stand up for yourself.  The whole family ready to jump in and rescue our sweet little flower from being trampled on.  Yet coach from the sidelines I did.  Praying, hoping that we can teach this girl some courage.  Praying, hoping just one kind girl will invite her to their lunch table.  Yet telling her it is better to sit alone than to succumb to the whim of everyone.

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Game Truck Party Mom

Game Truck, Game Truck oh how will you be.  A place of wonder and delight to me.  Games for the children and tranquility for me.  A parties entertainment you see.  Years upon years you have satisfied my guests.  Sticky cup cake hands all around me.  Game truck, game truck you will always be.  My friend my ally you are to me.  That coach, that coach how does he do it.  Screaming, chaos, a whirling derby to me.  Yet in they go one by one.  It amazes me.  He smiles and laughs and the chaos exits me.  My head I poke in and dare to see all my darlings playing peacefully.  Guns a blazing, Mario carts a racing, mind craft a building and Just Dance feet a dancing.  The fun they have on these games amazes me.  My darlings my darlings happy at last content with control in hand.  Now I can rest my guests and me.  Feet up as I gaze at a party well done.   Game Truck, Game Truck you have made a star out of me.


Zojirushi lunch

This is the best lunch box system my family has found.  My oldest and I wake at 5:30 to pack steaming lunches for all 5 kids.  This morning we made grilled cheese, tomato soup celery sticks and apple sauce.  The best part is working with my teen age girl to prepare all the food.  We are quite a team and with all her studies and clubs it is the only part of the day i am sure to see her.  Sure we are a bit tired and CRANKY but that just give opportunity to say we are sorry A LOT.  The best part is that all these containers are dish washer safe and keep the food hot.  We had tried regular thermos but the food tumbles around and turns it into a pile of mush by lunch.  Keeping the foods separate seems to be the key. 

Today recipe:
Grilled Cheese
Tomato Soup
Celery
apple sauce

Snack for Twins:
snack bar
frozen tube yogurt

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

What to do with the leftovers from dinner

Tonight was breakfast.  I  got to try out grits for the 1st time.  Not a southern girl here.  Actually I had never had them till I was in my 20's on a road trip with my family.  Can't say I liked them then but they weren't to bad tonight.  Everyone at them.  Now they weren't as big a hit as my scramble with eggs, potatoes, cheese, green onion, ham and fresh spinach.  So I have leftovers grits.  What to do.  That's what I am all about.  Not going to through good food down the drain.  Not with 7 mouths to feed.  Thinking grit muffins, pancakes or maybe the waffle iron.  Been searching the internet for some ideas.  I am thinking that pancake grits is going to win.